THINGS YOUNG PEOPLE DON'T REALIZE ABOUT GROWING OLD

Growing old is easy.  You either grow old or you don't. (period)

Staying young is difficult.  Pert near impossible.  I only said all this so I could use the phrase 'pert near'.  I don't think you will find a definition for 'pert' in the dictionary - I didn't - but we all know that it means, in this case, 'almost' or 'pretty' near.  You can find it in the Urban Dictionary on line.

The Urban Dictionary is one that is made up by ordinary young people - not dictionary mavens.  It gives you definitions of words and phrases you might hear on the streets.  I find it useful and funny.

For 'pert near', here is what one kid offered:  definition "really fuckin' close" examples  "I was pert near the gas station when I pert near hit an old lady walking across the street."  and  "Her nipples were so long, I pert near got my eye poked out."

Anyone can offer a definition and usage example but my guess is that most users are younger than me.  What can I say?  I'm pert near old.
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