CHRISTMAS

As December arrives, everyone becomes acutely aware that Christmas is near.  It is our duty to prepare ourselves for the big day.  Here are my thoughts.

1.)  I'd like to wrap some batteries in holiday paper for a store owners children and include the note "toys are not included".

2.)  The one thing women don't want to find in their stockings on Christmas morning is their husband's/boyfriend's feet.

3.)  It's not that I don't like Christmas, it's just that I'm Claus-trophobic.

4.)  The problem is that before Santa says Hello, all his friends say Good Buy.

5.)   Christmas is like a big snowball rolling down a hill.  No matter what you think of it, you can't stop it; its not going to stop - you had better learn to live with it.