NEWS

Once upon a time in a place far away, on a jungle island, twelve men of the Zuga tribe and eight of the Tombi tribe got together for an important safari.  Both tribes were well known in this jungle as fierce, talented hunters and, lo, sometime cannibals when the hunting was poor. 

They were out in the jungle for many days.  They killed a gnu, two okapi, a kudu and three warthogs.  This was a pretty good haul but not quite enough for both villages. 

On their way back home, the hunters came across two Americans on a photo safari.  It was the week after Christmas and John Lang and his fifteen year-old son were having the adventure of a lifetime. 

The Zugas and the Tombi were, to say the least, not real friendly with outsiders coming into their jungle.  They came down on the American pair with epic violence.  They cut out the father's tongue and threw him into a river.  They made a feast of the son - tender meat on these youngsters. 

The elder Lang survived and managed to make it back to civilization.  He reported the whole incident to the authorities, as best he could, and to the local newspaper. Here was the headline the next day:

OLD LANG SIGNS, TWENTY ATE TEEN.
Happy New Year!